Mibes: Well, good morning, to you. Good to see you again.
Me: I'm glad to see you too. Should we just get the hugging over with right now?
Mibes: What?
Me: So we can talk. I want to talk but I want a hug, too.
Mibes: We always do both, I don't know why this morning would be any different, but here you go. (Giving me another one of his trademark bear hugs.)
Me: mmmmm. Much better. Now I can talk.
Mibes: You've never had any trouble talking. But, please, go ahead.
Me: I'm glad you're willing to listen.
Mibes: I'm glad you're willing to join me for breakfast. I do miss you when you're not available. But I understand you've got lots going on.
Me: Well I was sitting down and writing out my morning prayer and I realized I hadn't told you something important.
Mibes: You were writing to God when we could have been having breakfast?
Me: No, it's not like that. I couldn't have met you that morning. But in a way I did meet you because I was writing about what I was thankful for and it was mostly about you and the way you see the world.
Mibes: Oh my, this does sound serious. Tell me more.
Me: I was thanking God for all the verbs in my life. The ability to accomplish, build, care, decide, encourage. Whole list of stuff.
Mibes: Alphabetical I see. You like to do that don't you?
Me: It does provide some structure. But here's the thing. The longer I made the list the more I thought about you. And how I needed to let you know how I'm grateful for you and all that you've done and are doing and will do.
Mibes: (ha ha) This is good. I think you're going to make my day with your list. But I already know you appreciate me. And I appreciate you. We've really got a remarkably reciprocal friendship.
Me: Yes, yes. I know. I love it. I love you. But this list. I'd never shared it with you before.
Mibes: Now you listen a moment. I know how you feel. I know you appreciate me because I appreciate you for similar reasons.
Me: But you haven't heard my list.
Mibes: But I know you. I have an idea of what's on it. You get kind of gushy in the mornings and so I'm guessing it's going to be a list of idealized actions, stuff that makes the world a better place.
Me: OK, maybe this is one of those rainbows we shouldn't try to deconstruct.
Mibes: I don't think of it a deconstruction. I think it's just good conversation. So let me guess. You left off with encourage. So maybe you continued on with find, give, help, invigorate, join, keep and love. How'd I do?
Me: Lousy. I went with elevate, facilitate, gather, hope, investigate, keep and learn.
Mibes: See. We agreed on keep, give and gather are close, you gather before you give and when you give you gather, help and hope go together, find and facilitate. I wasn't far off.
Me: Yes you were. You're just making fun of me now.
Mikes: On the contrary. You've done what I thought you'd do. Like I said earlier, you've chosen verbs that are all about ideals. You're hopelessly and wonderfully altruistic.
Me: But I'm not writing about me. I'm writing about you. And thanking you.
Mibes: It's great. I'm touched. I'm glad to hear your words. But here's the deal. I'm always glad to see you. Words or not. That's why I've tried to emphasize I'm good for breakfast anytime. Even if it's closer to midnight than sunrise.
Me: I thought I was going to impress you.
Mikes: You do. You are. Always have. Can't imagine a time you wouldn't.
Me: ahhh. (shaking my head) So you want to hear the rest of my list?
Mibes: I don't need to. But I'd love to. Yes, go right ahead.
Me: How 'bout we make it game. I'll give you my three and you give me your three.
Mibes: Sure.
Me: You're bored now, aren't you?
Mibes: No, I'm not bored. I'm amused. And I am game for your game, so go right ahead.
Me: OK. move, note and organize
Mibes: make, notice and open
Me: plan, question, reconsider
Mibes: prosper, quote, read
Me: strengthen, trust, understand
Mibes: stand, satisfy, try
Me: understand, volunteer, work
Mibes: unify, view, wonder
Me: x-ray, yearn, zing
Mibes: xerox, yield, zig and zag
Me: Whew! You did it. I did it. We did it. Thanks for playing along.
Mibes: Just remember that all of those wonder words that you think apply to me, I know they actually belong to you. You're just projecting.
Me: How do you know that you're not the one who's projecting?
Mibes: Maybe we both are.
Me: Probably. Thanks! And thanks for the hug.
Mibes: Here's another one to send you on your way. (Bear hug #2)
Me: And thanks for listening.
Mikes: You're easy on the ears and the eyes, you know.
Me: As are you my friend. As are you.
Accepting Changing and Ending Relationships
2 years ago
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