Friday, January 23, 2009

Put Your Wheel Back on the Stool, Push Along

In this post, Beck shows a what Scott calls a titillating scene, plus a three-leg and a four-leg stool. Since I wrote such a long response, I'm cross posting it here so I don't feel like I'm neglecting my blog--such are my rationalizations. ; )

Hey Beck, great discussion!

My age will show again here, but I'm remembering an old BJ Thomas song:

A little bit of love is
better than no love
Even the bad love is
better than no love
And even the sad love is
better than no love at all

I used to hear that and think, that's just wrong. Some kinds of love are destructive and just the opposite is true: Sometimes no love at all is better than than a bad love, sometimes a little love is too little too late and just isn't worth it.

And that's where I've mellowed and changed over the years. The physical affection my wife and I share is not as intense as it once was. But I'm grateful for all we do share. For me this "little bit of love" goes a long way and has helped keep us together for three decades.

But I'm also much more open to loving men and accepting their affection. Years ago if a high priest had put his arm around me during Priesthood, I'd have have thought it was creepy.

Now I just enjoy it. It happened last week. It was a blessing. I don't worry it. I just feel the warmth and acceptance. So what I once would have defined as inappropriate has become welcome. I "keep changing" as L might say.

Regarding your metaphor, I think our marriage stool is one with five or six wheels, and sometimes one of them falls off or needs replacement. It's a problem and it needs attention, but we can deal with it and otherwise it's a great stool.

p.s. Scott: The word "titillating" makes me laugh. Thanks for the chuckle!

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