Sunday, January 17, 2010

When Your Crush Responds

How long can a crush last? And what happens when you're back in touch with a person you crushed on years ago? I've wondered about these questions because one of my earliest crushes, a friend from high school, and I are back in touch at least via social networking and phone. He now lives several states away. Another friend who I worked with years ago also recently friended me on Facebook. He's relatively nearby, only about four hours by car. After more than a decade in both cases, I'm surprised how strong the connection feels. Anyone else have similar experiences?


  1. I don't think a crush ever ends until you get some amount of closure. In whatever form the closure comes in: sex, revenge, or just a douchey comment, it eliminates the crush. At least for me.

  2. This has happened to me multiple times. If the man-crush is combined with true friendship and love for that person, the connection never dies. I have experienced man-crushes that are going on 30 years now. They ebb and flow, but there is always something there.

    As long as I continue to desire something from the man-crush, it doesn't die, nor will it disconnect. It doesn't matter how much time has passed. Sometimes with time and familiarity, they are not as intense, but given the right circumstances, they can be as intense as they were initially - maybe it's just me, maybe it has to do with closure and I never want to quit on the possibility of that kind of connection... ever...

    Best of luck with your reconnectivity! Sounds intriguing.

  3. I have had a man-crush on my best friend for 15 years. He moved away for 10 years now he is back in my life. He is straight, married, and has kids. But the crush is as strong as ever because we have a true friendship and feel real love between us. I doubt this will ever die. I just have to deal with it. Warren

  4. Some of my crushes never go away and some do. Case-in-point, my best friend from high school came into town a couple of months back. He came over with his wife and kids, and I felt nothing. In fact, I found myself wishing for the evening to be over quickly. It was weird.